Wednesday 6 August 2014

Blog 31 - A New Season - A return to Hopes and Dreams

 
 
 
A New Season - A return to Hopes and Dreams
 
 
 
I haven't blogged for a long while, and I specifically haven't blogged about Norwich City. When I looked back it's been three years since I felt the urge to put finger to keyboard on the subject, an eternity for someone who used to write several articles a month for his fanzine. The main reason for this is that, to be quite frank, it's been too depressing. However with the long-overdue removal of Chris Hughton, and the encouraging pre-season work of Neil Adams there is finally a ray or two of sunshine emerging from the doom-laden dark clouds of the past. Plus, as I've just done the FourFourTwo season preview on Norwich City people may take a few seconds to read what I have to say and I get to ram my opinions through their synapses for a brief while.
 
To say the last two years were not enjoyable for me as a Norwich City fan is akin to saying Katie Hopkins is a little bit of an attention-seeking contrarian. Following Paul Lambert was always going to be a nigh on impossible task, and whilst Chris Hughton wasn't my choice, I understood the board's reasoning in appointing a guy with Premier League experience, who had managed on a tight budget, and a reputation within the game as an outstanding coach. But from the first game where we were battered 5-0 by Fulham and Hughton was at pains afterwards to point out that we couldn't compete with Fulham's technically superior players, I was struggling to identify with him. Particularly coming from a man who after four transfer windows to correct these technical deficiencies was proudly fielding the combined creative talents of Johnson and Tettey in midfield along with four shackled defenders and a goalkeeper every week.
 
The contrast between Lambert, the consummate winner, the confidence-builder, the bullish psychologist who wound up Colchester so successfully on his overhyped return, and Hughton's polite, tepid manner as he picked over the minor plus points of another half-hearted away defeat, was night and day. Hughton did have his good points. He is genuinely respected by everyone in the game and I don't think he ever "lost the dressing room" which considering the way we were playing is testament to the respect he obviously engenders. And few people have a major problem with the quality of the players he signed. Bassong, Redmond, Olsson, Turner, Fer. The ability was there for all to see. But the fact that he took what was by common consensus probably our best collection of players in the past twenty years and managed to get them relegated is equally testament to his inability to take a group of talented individuals and form them into an effective team. Lambert took average players and made them a good team. Hughton took good players and made them a bad team. "We lost our identity" was the line from Russell Martin, on relegation.
 
The style of football, whilst clearly defined by the organised deep-lying defence, and the patient, laboured build-up through the lines was not in keeping with the "Norwich City DNA" that the board has spoken so often about and it left most of the fans cold. A game plan that involves stopping the opposition scoring first and foremost and hoping to sneak a goal here and there is why we only mustered 28 in the entire season. Carrow Road was also the ground that saw least goals scored last season of all 92 clubs (35 compared to 80 at Coventry and 76 at Manchester City). It wasn't entertaining, and when it became clear it wasn't effective either, what was the point?
 
And so to Neil Adams. His audition at the end of last season was a mixed bag. A good performance with some ballsy tactical changes that almost salvaged something against an in-form Liverpool was undermined by a Hughtonesque no-show against Manchester United and the hype of Giggs' debut as caretaker manager (which by all rights should have been hushed up by a pre-game super-injunction). Adams baffled Jose Mourinho when, at 0-0 with ten minutes left of a must-win game for both sides, the rookie caretaker kept his troops back defending the barracks and settled for a point that ultimately meant the team had no chance of staying up. My theory at the time was that, given we were likely to go down anyway, a 0-0 draw at Chelsea looked better on Adams' managerial CV than a kitchen-sink throwing effort we may well have been caught out in attempting. Perhaps that's a little cynical but his reticence to go for it left me as confused as Jose in the circumstances. And ultimately, he got the job anyway so what do I know? Off-field his handling of some disciplinary issues drew praise from those in the know and cannot have hurt his application for the full-time position either.
 
When he was given the job permanently, following a drawn-out and ultimately confusing selection process that I won't even begin to pick over here, I was underwhelmed to say the least. He was and is, a massive throw of the dice. He has as much chance of failing as he has succeeding and for a club with a squad full of talented players that should be too good for this division, we should have been stacking those dice a little more in our favour with someone more proven.
 
However, he has impressed me with some of his decision-making since then. In terms of playing-style he has looked to be more adventurous, in pre-season at least, and play with a tempo that would have left Chris Hughton reaching for oxygen. His signing of Kyle Lafferty addressed the biggest gaping hole in the squad since Holt left, and Grabban and O'Neil are astute captures. For the most part though he looks happy to progress with the players he inherited, and this is perhaps no bad thing. The individual quality remains good and it is difficult to see how Adams could get less from them collectively than Hughton. The players, however removed they may be from the fan in the stands these days, will have felt the effects of last season. They will have felt the same weary depression as we did, watching the opposition monopolise the ball while they remained anchored rigidly to not chasing and losing their defensive shape or face the wrath of Calderwood. They were the ones making the fruitless runs that the deep-lying midfield had neither the range of passing, or the technical ability to find. To have an opportunity to show the skills they possess unencumbered by Hughtonball will free them as players once more. If Adams can handle them correctly, he can finally uncage some tigers against the Wolves on Sunday.
 
I'm still not all-in on Adams yet though. Russell Martin, whilst a lovely guy and a great pro, is not a clenched-fist, drag-em-by-the-scruff-of-the-neck type that I would have preferred as captain, and I long for the days of a Megson, Mackay or even a Holt to provide that Alpha Male influence, particularly with a new manager who needs his dressing room to be as self-servicing as possible while he grows into the role. Also Martin, for me, has not been so good that he should be guaranteed a starting spot which the captaincy would suggest. This is equally true, if not more so, for vice-captain Bradley Johnson. Whilst the captaincy itself is not a huge issue, the idea that Martin and Johnson are definite starters is a little worrying as both should have more to prove than the manager seems to think. Having said that, Adams was hardly spoilt for choice, with only Ruddy, Olsson, Turner and Howson seemingly firmly anchored as guaranteed names on the team sheet, and none of them are natural, vocal leaders either, despite smatterings of captaincy experience.
 
Overall, I think the ceiling for next season is that everything works to plan and we are free-scoring, dominant, Champions. There is a chance this could happen. The floor, the absolute worst I can see him doing with this group of players if we are bedevilled by injuries and inconsistency, is mid-table 10th-12th. The reality is probably somewhere in the play-off mix. For me to come to that conclusion, however, represents a hope that I haven't had for a couple of years. A belief that what I see from the team will be better than what has come before, or at least different, unpredictable, and fresh. It may be based on little more than the undeniably cynical premise that it can't be any worse, but Adams has shown just enough to get my supporting juices flowing again.
 
I'm, tentatively, getting my Norwich back. And yes, I'm aware that it's the hope that kills you...



Andy Head

Wednesday 7 May 2014

Blog 30 - 2014 NFL Mock Draft



2014 NFL Mock Draft
 
 
by Andy Head
 
 
 
1    -      Houston Texans  -   Blake Bortles
 
All the hubbub has Clowney, undisputedly the best player in the draft, going to the Texans, but I don't buy it. Houston had a horrible season last year. Horrendous. And they haven't added a QB in free agency other than Ryan Fitzpatrick, a perennial back up who they are paying back up money to. There is a massive hole where the most important player to a franchise should be. The media would have you believe that Houston will take Clowney and then move for another QB in Rnd 2. Seriously? See how much better this season is than last while Jimmy Garropolo or A.J. McCarron flail around, enduring all the same problems with protection that Matt Schaub bombed with last year. No, can't see it in a million years. Touting Clowney as the pick makes sense to drum up trade interest amongst the likes of Atlanta but I don't think it's convincing anyone except a few journalists. It will be a QB and that will mean Bortles or Manziel, and I think Bortles will be a better fit for Bill O'Brien's offense.
 
 
2   -       TRADE  -   Cleveland Browns  -  Johnny Manziel
 
With the first QB off the board, the race for Johnny Football begins in earnest. Jacksonville will be tempted, as will Tampa and Minnesota, but along with Oakland, they won't want to give up the picks. Cleveland have openly coveted Manziel and won't risk losing him. The franchise gets fresh life breathed into it. St Louis  gets pick 4 plus Cleveland's 2nd Rnd pick this year and next.
 
 
3   -       TRADE  -   Atlanta Falcons  -   Jadeveon Clowney
 
Atlanta, while sensibly holding back from giving up the farm to trade for number one, opt to pay the price for trading up three places to get the best pass rusher of the past decade at draft stage. Jacksonville extract pick 6, Atlanta's 2nd Rounder and a 3rd next year.
 
 
4  -        TRADE  -   San Francisco 49'ers  -  Sammy Watkins
 
Sammy Watkins, Khalil Mack and the remaining QB's are on the board and while St Louis will be tempted by the former two, they'll also be acutely aware that they can move down again and stockpile picks in a very deep draft. San Francisco, armed with a plethora of picks and needing an elite weapon to compete with the Superbowl champion Seahawks and improving Arizona, will take their shot with Watkins. St Louis gets San Francisco's 1st and 2nd Rnd picks this year and next years first.
 
 
5  -       TRADE  - Minnesota Vikings  -  Derek Carr
 
Minnesota HAS to get a QB and swaps their 3rd Rounder and next year's 4th, plus pick 8 for Oakland's pick.
 
 
6  -      Jacksonville Jaguars   -   Khalil Mack
 
While the Jaguars will hope to follow in St Louis's footsteps and trade down again, I think this is where normality makes a reappearance. Jacksonville will be tempted by Bridgewater because they are so short at QB but they'll stick with BPA on their board which will most likely be Mack.
 
 
7  -   Tampa Bay Buccaneers   -  Mike Evans
 
BPA that fits a need, Tampa will be delighted if Evans makes it to seven.
 
 
8   -   Oakland Raiders   -   Taylor Lewan

First shock of the night. With Robinson and Matthews still on the board, Oakland take Lewan, a workout warrior who they feel is the best overall fit for their offensive line.


9   -   TRADE   -    Dallas Cowboys   -  Aaron Donald

Dallas sneak up for the player they most covet and give up pick 16 and their second rounder to the grateful Bills.


10  -   Detroit Lions   -   Greg Robinson

Detroit go with the best player on their board and will be pleasantly surprised to have a choice between Robinson and Matthews. Robinson is a better fit for them and has a higher ceiling.


11   -   Tennessee Titans   -   Anthony Barr

There's a reason so many mocks have Barr going to the Titans. It just makes too much sense. Perfect fit for a team that sorely needs a pass rusher.


12   -   TRADE   -   Miami Dolphins   -   Jake Matthews

Miami, desperately in need of an offensive line with stability and character can't resist trading up for a guy that has both in spades. Has to sacrifice pick 19 and their second rounder to get him though.


13   -   St Louis Rams   -   Ha Ha Clinton-Dix

Rams fans finely see their team go up to the podium. Ha-Ha Clinton-Dix would improve their secondary considerably and is an easy value pick at 13.


14   -   Chicago Bears   -   RaShede Hageman

You either love Hageman or you don't, he's extremely polarising. One team will fall in love with him, and I can see the Bears having a great deal of interest in a player that can add to the refurbishment of their defensive core.


15   -   Pittsburgh Steelers   -   Darqueze Dennard

BPA at position of need. Strong, physical beast of a corner who fits the Steelers like a glove.


16  -  Buffalo Bills   -   Eric Ebron

The Bills drop down and pick up the player they may well have drafted at nine anyway. Ebron gives EJ Manuel an extra safety blanket to go along with his young wide receiver corps.


17   -  Baltimore Ravens   -   Odell Beckham Jr

Baltimore does what it always does. Sits tight, drafts BPA, and somehow comes out with exactly what they need.


18  -  New York Jets   -   Justin Gilbert

The Jets need a CB in the worst way and Gilbert is, by consensus, one of the top prospects in this years class. They'd be delighted to get him at 18.


19   -   New York Giants  -   Louis Nix III

New York could go in a number of directions with this pick, and they're not averse to springing a surprise with their selections. Nix is an outstanding defensive lineman who is great value at 19.


20   -   Arizona Cardinals   -   Calvin Pryor

Arizona struggled mightily against Tight Ends last season and the versatile all-round Safety, Calvin Pryor would be an immediate upgrade.


21   -   Green Bay Packers   -  Jordan Matthews

Green Bay have had some turnover in their receivers and Aaron Rodgers needs someone to catch the ball. Matthews, an interesting prospect with great measurable would be a reach with great upside.


22   -   Philadelphia Eagles   -   Kyle Fuller

Philadelphia traditionally draft well, and Fuller would be a solid addition to their backfield.


23   -   TRADE   -   Jacksonville Jaguars   -   Teddy Bridgewater

With both Kansas and Cincinnati rumoured to have interest in Bridgewater, Jacksonville throws the dice and throws in their own second rounder and their third rounder to secure their franchise quarterback.


24  -   Cincinnati Bengals   -   Zack Martin

The Bengals have holes after free agency saw some influential players leave, and the versatile offensive lineman, Zack Martin would cure many ills.


25   -   San Diego Chargers   -   Bradley Roby

San Diego could go in a number of directions. I think Roby fills a need and will be amongst the BPA's by this stage.


26   -   Cleveland Browns   -   Marqise Lee

Having kept their second first-round pick in the trade to get Manziel, Cleveland then uses the pick to secure a new toy for him. Lee paired with Josh Gordon will revolutionise Cleveland's offensive threat from Day 1.


27   -   New Orleans Saints   -   Morgan Moses

The giant Moses will help keep the heat off Drew Brees and complete a fearsome offensive line for the Saints.


28   -   Carolina Panthers   -   Brandin Cooks

Carolina were one of the bigger losers in free agency, so the draft is vital for them in securing extra resource. Cooks will provide a speedy, reliable target for Cam Newton and expand their options.


29   -   New England Patriots   -   Austin Seferian-Jenkins

New England never quite go in the direction you expect. This year they appear enamoured with Seferian-Jenkins and have looked him over three times in workouts and visits. With Gronkowski unreliable and Hernandez gone, they need a tight end and ASJ has huge upside.


30   -   St Louis Rams   -   Joel Bitonio

St Louis makes an unspectacular but solid selection to beef up their offensive line options with the pick they acquired from San Francisco.


31   -   Denver Broncos   -   C.J. Moseley

What do you get for the team that has everything? The leader of the Alabama defence of course. Moseley fills a need in the middle of the Bronco's transitional linebacking corps.


32   -   Seattle Seahawks   -   Cyrus Kouandjio

An addition to Russell Wilson's protection detail who struggled with injuries at times last season. Kouandjio will add depth, size and a big potential upside.



The draft should be awesome this year with an awful lot of depth across the board. Trades could well be flying around, especially at the top of the round, and I can't wait to see how it plays out.


Andy
 

Monday 5 May 2014

Blog 29 - 2014 NFL Draft - Big Board




2014 NFL Draft Big Board

by Andy Head




It's that time of the year when I go into Sports Geek overdrive for my favourite three days of the year, the NFL draft. Those of you who know me are probably aware that I love the NFL, but my favourite event of the season by far is the draft, even over the Superbowl (possibly because my team, the Arizona Cardinals are at least involved in the draft every year, unlike the Superbowl, or even, the playoffs).

A Big Board is where you rank all the available players in order of ability. Mine is also broken down by position as well and colour coded by round grade.





The difference between my rankings and the ones you will see in the media and from most draftniks is that mine are done "partially sighted". Being in the UK we don't see college games, and most of us don't have any college allegiances, so the first time I look at tape of the years draft crop is not until after the combine in February. I try not to read too many of the early season mock drafts so that when I look at the draftees I'm going in with as open a mind as possible. Obviously I'm not entirely unaware of the bigger names, with Clowney, Manziel, Bridgewater and Sam making headlines from thousands of miles away and guys like Matthews and Lewan who almost came out for the draft last year still fresh in the memory but I'd not seen anything of the likes of Robinson, Ebron, Watkins and Mack until the draft process began. I think that this gives me a unique perspective as I'm going solely on what I see on tape. I use the combine invitees as the basis for my Big Board and grab what tape I can online on each and every player.

As you'll see from my Big Board I have some wildly differing opinions from the norm. However, I'm not shying away from this and backing my own judgement. Last year I was a big fan of some unheralded players who then went on to be unexpected successes, guys such as Joe Fauria from UCLA who went on to be a spectacular early season success for the Detroit Lions. Terrance Williams was my second overall Wide Receiver but only heard his name called by Dallas in Rnd 3 before having a highly impressive debut season.Tyrann Mathieu, the troubled defensive back was also a big favourite of mine and he ended up among the Rookie of the Year candidate discussions. Likewise the year before I was a proponent of gambling on the undrafted Vontaze Burfict who has since gone on to be the highest tackling defender in the league. Equally I've had my failures (Matt Barkley's 1st Rnd Grade was a particular lowpoint!) but that's the fun of it.

Things that will jump out at those with a reasonable knowledge of this years draft class:

  • Johnny Manziel 2nd best player in the draft? - Yes, you read it correctly. Other than Clowney there is nobody in this draft I rate as highly as Manziel. He has thrown and run for thousands of yards in college, and the only knock anyone seems to have is that "he likes to party". Show me the college guy who doesn't. He can make every throw, take off as a running threat greater than any QB currently in the NFL, and he still hasn't had NFL coaching to make him even better. The guy is going to transfer a failing franchise.
  • Isaiah Crowell best running back? - On pure talent, he's well ahead of the opposition. Nobody else consistently runs between and through tackles for big gains like this kid. By all accounts he has a plethora of off-field issues, but with this much talent someone will have to take a chance. See Burfict and Matthieu.
  • Kony Ealy and Demarcus Lawrence only 4th and 5th Rnd picks? - I can only go on the tape I see and neither displayed anything like the skills that have seen most draftniks grade them as Rnd 1-2 prospects. Ealy's burst is overrated and he still looks a year and a few pounds away from fulfilling his potential to me. Lawrence was wildly inconsistent and tends to fly around at speed but, again, he's slight and often sloppy with his technique.
  • Khalil Mack only rated 18? - Mack is rated in most people's Top 5 players in the draft. Whilst I liked him, I didn't see anything that wowed me. I prefer both Van Noy and Barr as edge rushers, although I think Mack is more versatile. I'm sure he'll go on to have a great career, but I just don't think he's the elite prospect that the consensus does.
  • ILB - Preston Brown at 8, and CJ Mosley only 3rd Rnd? - Preston Brown impressed me more than any other linebacker except Van Noy. One of those occasions where a player unexpectedly jumps off the tape. As I'd never heard of him before I watched the tape, I did due diligence and watched extra games to see if I'd fluked a couple of exceptional games from an inconsistent player, but he was awesome every time. Big, imposing, and with a habit of always being close to the action, either making tackles himself or backing up the guy who was, I struggled to fault him. Until last week he had been broadly ignored by the draft community, although he has now moved into NFL Network guru Mike Mayock's top 5 ILB rankings and since then a few others have sneaked him onto their board, although still no higher than Rnd 4. Brown is my guy in this draft, and I'm certain he will catch on with whatever team is smart enough to select him. Mosley was  the leader of the Alabama defence so you would expect great things, but I could see nothing from his tape that made me think he would be anything than Just Another Guy in the NFL. He's a little slow, his anticipation is not always all it could be and there was nothing that he did well enough to make me see a first or second rounder.
  • Safeties - Jimmie Ward 3rd Rnd, Deone Bucannon 4th, and Dixon and Berhe 2nd Rnd? - Again, I go with the tape. Bucannon is another that flies around, but often misses tackles in his enthusiasm to make a hit for his own highlight reel. Ward just didn't pop. Dixon and Berhe however did, and whilst I don't see either as definite blue chip 1st Rounders, they both have great individual qualities and high consistency levels. Two teams could pick up some excellent value in the mid-late rounds with these guys.
  • Aaron Colvin Rnd 1, but Verrett and Gilbert Rnd 3? - Colvin would easily have been in Rnd 1 contention and would probably been the first CB off the board if he hadn't been injured. He hits like a linebacker, has great instincts and the speed and size to play anywhere across the backfield. Verrett suffers because of size. Whilst he has great technique, he gets outmuscled by average college wide receivers. He can't be seen as anything other than a risk at NFL level and this in turn effects his stock. Gilbert is many people's top CB and is still being mocked in the Top Ten picks. I think of him as a cake that has all the right ingredients but still doesn't taste quite right. He's another that seems to be amassing flashy film, but when you watch a whole game there's sloppiness there that will get exploited at the next level.
  • Sefarian-Jenkins at 5 overall? - Just can't see him being anything other than a star in the NFL. Huge size, great hands, awesome blocker. I know there are questions marks regarding attitude and durability but I haven't heard anything too disquieting and the tape is exceptional.

Hope you enjoy the Big Board. I will attempt a mock before Thursday to accompany this and then I'll crawl back into my bloghole for another year in all probability! Couldn't let Draft season come and go without throwing my neck on the line though!

Andy


Tuesday 10 December 2013

Blog 28 - Follow the Leader

The passing of the great Nelson Mandela has been met with various tributes this week, from the humbling and affectionate words of his friends and family, to the expected soundbites of the various world leaders. Watching these, and remembering the huge impression his book "The Long Walk to Freedom" made to me as an idealistic teenager, the thing which struck me most was that this was a man who had achieved so much, locally, nationally and globally, and yet he was not a man with a thirst for power. Power had found it's way to him. His first forays into politics with the ANC were not because he wanted to get into politics for politics sake. He found the subject of politics boring as a young man and he was happier being Jack-The-Lad and chasing women. Apartheid however, was something that needed to be fought, and Mandela, a strong, intelligent, educated man, knew that he was needed. Quickly, he became the figurehead of the party and the struggle. In prison, on Robben Island, this continued, and any peaceful protests against the guard's treatment of prisoners were led by Mandela, his behaviour mirrored by the others. The guards quickly came to the conclusion that to achieve an end with the prisoners you had to talk to Mandela. Upon gaining his freedom, already an old man, he took upon the mantle of leading the ANC in South Africa's first free elections, not because he was keen to be involved in affairs of state, but because he felt it was the right thing to do for the country and to bring a peaceful end to apartheid. He left the position after only one term, with his task achieved, to concentrate on his family and charity work, using his iconic status to highlight global issues such as poverty and aids. At each step he had power placed in his hands rather than him feeling the need to reach for it.

If we contrast the leadership of Mandela with modern politicians, the differences could not be more acute. The recent entertaining shennanigans of Russell Brand on Newsnight highlighted, in his charming loquacious urchin manner, the reality of political opinion for a generation of voters. We have no genuine leaders. We have a succession of people who are essentially from the same stock, who wear the same suit, reading similar words by similarly educated speechwriters, and who will tell us anything, truth or fiction, to gain a vote on election day, and then happily ignore every promise they've made once elected. These are people for whom gaining power is the objective. The destination and not the journey. Find a bloke who looks good on tv, looks potentially charismatic but will happily say what he's told by the spin doctors instead of, god forbid, his own thoughts, slap him in the right colour tie and he can lead the nation. Doesn't matter if he's clever, or intelligent, or has any social or morale compass. As long as he says what he's told, does very little so he can't make a visible mistake and lose votes, he's golden.

In this country, Gordon Brown was a very successful Chancellor and by all accounts a hugely intelligent and capable public servant, but his Gollumesque desire for the "Precious" ring of Prime Minister has made him a by word for political incompetency. At a time when we experienced the first televised pre-election political debates, Brown could not have performed any less favourably. Whilst Cameron robotically punched out his message, and Clegg twinkled his underdogs smile, Brown clumsily lurched through his scripted answers with all the charm and wit of a flatulent corpse. He committed gaffe upon gaffe in the run up to the election and unsurprisingly was well beaten. The depth of his fall from grace really hit home to me recently when he was asked to give a speech on the economy at a Labour Event in Scotland and it had to be cancelled because not one single ticket had been requested by the public. A recent Chancellor and Prime Minister and nobody wanted to hear him speak. 

In any intelligent organisation, this man would still be playing a key role. Not public facing obviously, but behind the scenes, using his knowledge and experience to help the economy. Whatever your views on the Labour government, or his role as Chancellor or PM, it can't be argued that there are few people if any, in this country, who are more qualified to help plan a way out of the recession. Similarly, there are previous Tory Chancellors who could equally prove useful in this regard. But due to the political system, we are obliged to play a 5 yearly game of musical chairs and if you're wearing the wrong colour tie at the wrong time, you're not allowed to help the country, you have to sit on the other side of the room and criticise those that are trying to fix the problem whilst they're doing it, until it's your turn to have a go again. Good people whose abilities are lost to the country because of an outmoded political system. Brown's consuming need for the top job, cost him a reputation for considered and competent decision making as Chancellor which he actually deserved. 

The United States is no better. George W Bush was staggeringly ill-fitting as the leader of the free world, ticking virtually no boxes as a leader. A unifier of the nation? Charismatic? Intelligent? He had a name that Republicans knew, but he had no ideas of his own and no concept of conducting himself as a competent international statesman. Yet he was elected twice. Sort of. Whilst his opponent Al Gore, a politician who has really grasped and embraced key global challenges such as the environment and the economy, was shuffled off the political landscape for the sake of a handful of questionable votes. How much more could have been achieved if he'd have been given a key position in the government aimed at tackling global warming?

To succeed as a political leader over the past 25 years or so you needed to be seen as a "Safe pair of hands" for the party to elect you. After a series of bland men, promising much and delivering little, the public are tired of the game and crying out for someone to lead. The most obvious figure in this regard in Britain is Boris Johnson. Styling himself almost as a British Bush, his cartoonesque buffonery has created a media personality that the British people recognise immediately, which is unusual for a nation that increasingly hits the mute button when politicians mumble things they don't mean at us. He also chooses deliberately not to appeal to everyone. His right wing opinions, his unadulterated adulation of all things Margaret Thatcher, his unabashed love of greed, would usually be the kind of ideology that a politician would avoid at all costs. But it works for him. People love that he stands for something, no matter whether they agree or not. You know what you'll get with Boris. Obviously by voting for him you'd be handing a Clouseau-esque pantomime villain the keys to the nuclear button and effectively the survival of all mankind, but hey, politics would no longer be boring. The power of warts and all honesty is seductive in election times. Of course, cynic that I am, I don't believe for a second that Johnson's entire image hasn't been carefully planned by a Tory think tank and sold to the nation piece by piece since the day he came to prominence on "Have I Got News For You" bumbling about "falling into a massive elephant trap" as Ian Hislop publically disembowelled him. Whilst he may not have made a particularly good impression that night, the fact was he made an impression. And if the viewers noticed you can bet the spin doctors noticed as well. But as much as I can see the seductive voter appeal of Johnson, equally, whilst he may represent boldness and a committed stance as a leader of the country, he's just another actor playing the part of a real leader. If he were elected, who genuinely believes he would make any decisions himself? He's not going to be the brains of the organisation, just the face and the mouthpiece. He's the Tony the Tiger on the Tories Frosties box. And the people making the real decisions behind the scenes will be the same Eton clique running Cameron and Osbourne now. The people we don't see and don't know we're electing to the real positions of power. 

I recently read a biography of Abraham Lincoln, and one of the key reasons for his success as a President, and the remarkable amount of change he was able to achieve whilst also fighting a civil war, was that when he took office as President, he appointed those who were his fiercest rivals within the party, to the key jobs in government. Those whom he fought for the parties nomination became his closest advisors. There were even some Democrats appointed to key positions at the expense of Republicans because they were better qualified. He wanted the best, not just those that agreed with him on every point. But he led himself. He would, on occasion, veto entire amendment suggestions raised within cabinet by himself if he felt them wrong. Equally he was capable of great concessions on points that mattered personally to him if he felt that others reasoning was stronger than his own. The success of the nation was the only consideration in his mind. I need not labour the comparisons to Mandela in this regard. 

Lincoln and Mandela understood the need to work with people and not against them. They are true leaders, worthy of following. I doubt I will see any leaders of such integrity and gravitas again in my lifetime. But these are the men we must seek to fix our ailing civilisation. Not just someone who looks good in a suit and spins promises they can't and won't keep. Attracting men of such character to a dishevelled political system hellbent on power for power's sake will be the problem we must solve.

Tuesday 6 August 2013

Blog 27 - Judging

I was watching something on TV the other day, I forget what it was, but it had real people in so was either a documentary or reality tv.

One person said to the other "You're judging me!", and this grabbed the attention of the assembled bystanders. There was an almost visible intake of breath.

"I'm not judging you because I'd never do that. Ever", was the reply from the alleged judge. Correct answer apparantly. The bystanders relaxed. She was back in the game.

This seems to be a big thing from what I see these days, both myself, and increasingly in the teeny programmes my girls are starting to get into. Judging is a big no-no. Judge not lest thouself be judged.

This is of course, contrary to human nature. We judge EVERYTHING. From the unconscious like "How far do I have to hop so I don't splash in that puddle?", or "Can I make it before that light turns red?" to the more considered "Can we afford to buy a new car?", or "Can I drink one more pint and still make the last bus home?".

Why then is it considered bad form to judge people? I judge everyone. If you're reading this and you know me, I've made a judgement about you. I've probably made lots of judgements about you. And I'd be shocked to shit if you hadn't done the same about me. If you've made the effort to read this then you probably don't mind me as a person. Either that or you're planning to sue me and looking for ammunition amongst my paranoid ramblings. If so fill your boots, there's probably plenty to go on. But if you are one of those that don't mind me, you probably like some things about me, but could happily forego other aspects of what passes for my personality. You might find me devilishly attractive but at the same time think I have a grating sense of self-righteousness. You may think I'm kind but overbearing. We all have pro's and con's.

I think the idea about judging someone being a bad thing come from the notion that if you are judging someone you are setting yourself above them. "Who are you to judge me?" is the cry. But if you judge everyone based on the same criteria, regardless of who they are, then why should you not have an opinion? Regardless of whether it's a friend, or a politician, or a footballer or a boss at work, if a man, say, cheats on his wife I'll have the same opinion of him and his actions in that context. Equally, he may have other characteristics that I do approve of. After their wives kick them out, the friend may put her through a messy divorce and upset the kids, whereas the politician may come clean and spend all his time trying to win back his wife's trust (unlikely I know but work with me). Either way I'm still judging them on their actions. If my friend's actions really disappoint me, I may stop being his friend. I may judge that he is not the type of person that I want to be friends with. And yes, in this context, that would be because I think I'm better than him in some ways. Important ways. At least important to me.

When people say "Who are you to judge me?" what people are really saying is "Who are you to have an opinion of me that I don't like?". Nobody complains about being judged if someone says "In my opinion you are a lovely person". What they're almost certainly saying is "Please don't voice a judgement because it will paint me in a negative light as even I'm aware that I'm behaving badly". They infer that judgement is a bad thing because judgement will place the judge above them morally. But if that feeling of superiority is justified, that judgement is valid.

I judge people. I always have and always will. If you do something I don't like or don't agree with I may tell you.

"Who are you to judge me?" you may say.

I'm just me and it's just my opinion. You may not care about my opinion. If so, bravo.

But beware the person that squawks "Who are you to judge me?". They're probably behaving like an arse at the time.

Friday 19 October 2012

Blog 26 - Let people who say nothing be in charge

I am going to talk about politics.

I'm sorry.

I'll try to be brief and not scare you too much.

I've just found out that Andrew Mitchell has resigned as Chief Whip or whatever the hell he is in the Tory government or Coalition or United Nations or patrons of Twitter or whoever the hell runs this damn country now.

Now I'm not a fan of the Tories, never have been, never will be, never voted that way and probably never will. But what the hell are we doing forcing a man to lose his job for letting his guard down for one minute and getting arsey with someone who annoyed him? If we did that to everyone nobody would have a bloody job.

The tabloids say he called a policeman who stopped him riding his bike through a gate a pleb. He said he asked "Arn't you guys supposed to be fucking helping us?". He may be lying to make it sound better (and given the amount of play the pleb line has got that sounds likely) or he may be telling the truth. Either way, he got annoyed. He later apologised and the policeman accepted.

Now, following newspapers banging on about the non-event, and the Twitchforks coming out on social media, weeks later, he's given into pressure and resigned.

What in the name of God are we doing as a society? Are we saying that only people who are on their guard 24/7 should be employed? Only people who have exactly mainstream ideas can be allowed to speak to anyone? Maybe we should put a pre-programmed computer in charge of the country. It can make no decisions of any consequence but parrot them out in monotone inoffensive soundbites that nobody could object to. Or is that what Cameronbot 2000 is already doing?

Every day we make our world more bland, lest we share an opinion that may not be to everyones cup of tea and therefore offensive. Every company now has a Facebook or Twitter policy to prevent their employees mentioning their work or colleagues. No good things, no bad things. Just say nothing. We are a society of saying nothing out of fear of the consequences.

Mitchell, whoever he is, or whatever he does, is just a bloke. He may be rubbish at his job, or really good. He may be a total arse or the salt of the earth. I have no idea. But he's just lost his job because he got a bit snippy with one person for 30 seconds. And not because anyone was really "offended", but because they just banged on about it until the point where everyone got so fed up that it wasn't worth the bloody hassle any more.

Well done Britain.

You twat.

Thursday 5 April 2012

My friend Jon

This week I lost one of my oldest and closest friends.

When I first received the call to say that he had passed away I was hit initially by shock, followed swiftly by tremendous guilt that I hadn't done more and spent more time with him in recent months. I think it's an uneasy feeling that a lot of people who knew Jon will share as well at this time.

However, even as I type this, I can hear his voice in my head saying "That's bollocks Heady", and as with Y'Army articles, condensing an entire paragraph of my rambling waffle into one succinct soundbite.

I share some of Jon's demons and I had the late night chats with him when things were bad and we both agreed that this illness doesn't get better or go away. You just go through different stages of tolerance. Jon loved his friends and his family and I know for a fact that he wouldn't want any of us feeling guilty or responsible for things we had no more control over than he did. For all the darkness he encountered he remains one of the most positive people I have ever known and I know that this is how he would want us to feel when he is in our thoughts.

By now, with his editorial hat on he'd be telling me to get on with something funny. As he told me once when he had me constructing a leaving poem for a colleague at N.U. "Try and get some laughs and applause Heady. You deserve the clap."

I first met Jon 13 years ago. He was my first proper boss in my first proper job and when I arrived there I had led a relatively sheltered life and was a shy and nervous kid. As those of you who know me will testify I'm now the most horrendous gobshite, and a startling amount of that change was down to Jon's partly sage and partly dubious influence. As well as my boss, he became a friend and a mentor.

Inside of work he taught me not only how to do my job, but how to be better than the job I was in. I learned so much about how to behave as an adult and an individual from Jon. Outside of work, the lessons were more based upon how I could disgrace myself but get away with it. He shanghaied me into pubs I would have never dared to have gone into before. Curry houses that no human being should have gone into, ever. And he showed me what happened in those buildings that have signs with three "X"'s outside. In short he helped me grow up. Those years in the EPT, are some of the happiest times of my life and Jon was a huge part of that. He looked after me and metaphorically deflowered me all at once, and I include that mangled metaphor because I know how much Jon would chuckle at it. It was a few years of ridiculous nonsense and mischief.

To my lasting regret I wasn't in Manchester the night that he and some accomplices on a departmental training trip who shall remain nameless, were evicted from the hotel that backed onto the Old Trafford cricket pitch. They'd climbed down from their balcony which led into the stands and were caught by the security guard pretending to bowl and bat on the wicket in the pitch black whilst slightly hammered and stark bollock naked. A typical night out with Jon in many ways. Only a 2 a.m. chorus of "Jerusalem" in a residential street away from being textbook.

This was what was great about Jon though. He was a human catalyst. He had an unbelievable randomness and spark and when you were with him he'd end up talking you into doing things and going places that you'd never normally consider. And they'd end up being great memories. A typical phone call from Jon would be: "Heady, you're not doing anything today are you? We're going to Boston/Dagenham/Cambridge/Some random football ground we've never been to before" and we'd be in the car and on our way. Or we'd go down to London on the train and find ourselves in Hamleys lobbing cuddly toys at each other. As you do.

Y'Army gave me some of my favourite memories and again, Jon was the catalyst. Jon and Dave came up with the initial concept and I got on board to add in some additional content and it was one of the best things I've ever done in my life. I look back on the fanzine with great pride as I know Jon also did. Dave was fantastic at putting the publication together and I hammered up sufficient articles to give us enough for people to read, but without Jon the project would never have got off the ground. Endlessly positive, he drove the fanzine from being a pipedream into a reality. Whatever challenge came up, Jon would rise up to meet it.

I've played football at Colney because Jon set it up. I've seen a song I made up sung to Darren Huckerby on tv to convince him to stay at Norwich City because Jon organised it (Look East didn't think it could be done. Jon thought differently and made it happen). I've been part of so many wonderful things that are the result of Jon's hard work, and his gift of the gab, and just Jon being Jon. I don't know if I ever properly articulated to him how much this meant to me. I hope he knew.

The most telling thing of all in this however, is that I am by no means one of the people closest to Jon. As we both got older and since I've had kids we naturally grew apart. We always stayed in touch and checked in regularly to see how we were both doing, but we lost a bit of that closeness that we once had. However, I know that there are hundreds of people who feel just like I do about Jon. People that in recent times he spent far more time with than me. He made friends wherever he went. I'm tempted to say that he had a close friend on every continent except Antarctica, but there's probably a penguin that's had a beer with Jon who loved the guy. He mixed with so many different people from so many walks of life. I can't imagine how many lives he touched. How many people his energy and enthusiasm have lifted.

Jon was only 37 when he was taken from us, but in that time he lived a life and a half. If a man is made up of the friends he makes or the joyful memories he creates, then he has have lived a fuller life than many of those who make it to 100.

Jon, I will miss you greatly. I know I'll see you again one day, and at that point you'll take the piss out of me for blubbering like a little girl on more than one occasion over the past couple of days, and I'll respond by saying that if all angels look like you I might consider an alternative destination. But I know you'll be waiting my friend.

And for the love of God, find a more palatable class of curry house for us to go to by the time I get up there...